Facebook & Divorce?

For most people, Facebook is a harmless way to keep in touch with friends and family. But flirtations on the social networking site are now becoming a major factor in marriage breakdown.

Family lawyers have revealed that the problem has become so great that almost every divorce they have dealt with in the past year has involved the website. One expert said she had dealt with 30 cases in the last nine months and Facebook had been implicated in them all. Whilst another online law company said one in five of their divorce petitions in the past year contain references to Facebook.

Emma Patel, the head of family law at Hart Scales & Hodges Solicitors, said the site acted like a "virtual third party" in splits. "Facebook is being blamed for an increasing number of marital breakdowns, and it is quite remarkable that all the petitions that I have seen here since May have cited Facebook one way or another," she said. "Its huge popularity as well as the lure of sites like Second Life, Illicit Encounters and Friends Reunited are tempting couples to cheat on each other. Suspicious spouses have used these to spy and find evidence of flirting and even affairs, which have then led to break-ups." She said that many of divorces came after partners found "flirty messages" on the Facebook wall of their partner – and also "inappropriate suggestive chats" which spouse's can see.

The lawyer said that she urged all clients to "stay off" Facebook during divorce proceedings – as it could throw a spanner in the works of it going smoothly – especially if they post photos of new lovers. She said: "They feel compelled to share their feelings online, and, in some cases, they not only express their stress, but also make inflammatory accusations against their partner. Divorce is a highly-charged and emotional time, but it is vital not to turn the situation into a public slagging match, played out for everyone to see online. The situation has deteriorated so badly that we advise feuding couples to avoid these sites until their divorces are settled."

The family law specialist based in Dorking, Surrey, said that one divorcing couple's rows on Facebook got so bad one party was charged with malicious communication after the police got involved.

A spokesman for Facebook said it was "tosh" that Facebook could ruin a relationship. It is like blaming your mobile phone or your emails," he said. "Does being on Facebook force you to do something – absolutely not I would say."